sonovelo Chapter 148: S3. Using The Past As A Mirror - 5
Chapter 148: S3. Using The Past As A Mirror - 5
Would mice frozen by a snake’s gaze feel like this?
The Namgung siblings and Envers were overwhelmed by that venomous gaze, stiffly standing and awkwardly looking around. Some emotions have a way of overpowering people.
The irritation and anger filling her eyes, from whatever unpleasant experiences she had endured, made it difficult to even ask if something bad had happened today.
However, even if they had mustered the courage to ask, it wouldn’t have made much difference.
Who in the world would go from being a man to a woman, from hating humans to treating them as toys to liking them, from wearing lingerie to frills to nothing at all?
For an Evil God with a form transcending biological categories, such transformations should have been as meaningless as a passing breeze. Just as assigning gender to a stone or a blade would make no difference.
Changing forms and voices to plunge humans into anguish was its primary function, so pretending to be human should have evoked no emotion.
But this practically tip-toed the line. The distance between what was acceptable and not was far too close.
It was the difference between controlling a character beyond the lines of text and an actor playing a role.
The role it was forced to play by the Crazy Wizard’s direction seeped in bit by bit, pushing aside the Evil God’s data. It made it empathize.
Amidst the confusion of having its shell change with each passing day, it had to admit that something within itself was gradually changing.
But since it was difficult to escape this situation, it could only follow fate.
Hee Yeonghyeon (希永玄) began her role-play as a beautiful young Beggar’s Union Leader, in line with the Crazy Wizard’s direction, putting emotion into it.
Q. What kind of character is she?
A. This person called Hee Yeonghyeon was a butterfly pinned to reality.
Q. Do you really think so?
A. ......
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Have you ever had a dream?
If someone says they haven’t, they must surely be a terrible liar.
Only those who have lost their dreams say, ‘I have never dreamed.’
It’s so painful not to achieve them that they pretend as if they never existed, as if they never wanted them in the first place.
I was originally a girl named So Yeonghyeon (蘇永玄).
The name meaning “eternally black” carries the wish for longevity, hoping that black hair won’t turn white for a long time. It was a name given by my father, filled with hope for me to live a long and healthy life.
I heard he paid a hefty sum to a skilled Daoist to get this name. They would pat the swollen belly and laugh, calling, “Yeonghyeon, Yeonghyeon, when will you come out?”
However, they couldn’t have known that I would kill my mother upon birth.
The picture of a happy family my father dreamed of was torn from the very first stroke. He agonized painfully until I turned seven, and finally concluded, ‘I never had such a dream.’
So he took away his only daughter’s surname, leaving her with just a name and abandoning her on the streets.
Thus, I became Yeonghyeon (永玄).
This girl wandered the streets begging, enduring all sorts of hardships, until she was taken in by a kind-hearted beggar and became part of the Beggar’s Union.
He was my immediate predecessor as the Beggar’s Union Leader.
He was a braggart. Even when the future looked bleak, he would strut around saying things would work out somehow. Even as the Beggar’s Union was declining and dark storms were approaching, he believed that if they did good deeds, heaven would surely help them.
If you ask how optimistic he was...
He added the character “hope” (希) to my name and called me Heeyeong (希永). He seemed to call me that, meaning “eternally hopeful.”
When the Beggar’s Union was prosperous, it apparently had the nature of an orphanage, taking in and caring for beggars from each region.
With money and power, they could do such good deeds. Even though the current crumbling Beggar’s Union had no capacity to continue such activities, he did it anyway.
When I said, ‘If we go on like this, we’ll really become beggars. We’ll end up being sold to those Hao Sect punk!’
He would say, “I too grew up as a beggar helped by the Beggar’s Union. So shouldn’t we give back even when times are tough?”
And with that... He kept on helping... And helping...
Until he died. It was said he was ambushed by some gang, but the Beggar’s Union didn’t even have the strength to investigate their own leader’s death, so it ended without even knowing who the killers were.
As such, I became the next generation Beggar’s Union Leader.
My benefactor had died by the sword, so I wanted to at least protect the Beggar’s Union he had left behind. So I cut away this and that. I cut and sold off the information network, and reduced the workforce.
Before it weakened further, I sold it at a high price to the Hao Sect to at least preserve the name, and finally, I cut off the practice of taking in and caring for young beggars.
In the end, only the three characters of the name Hee Yeonghyeon (希永玄) remained.
To conclude, I would say I have never had a dream.
Not even once.
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Clatter.
Hee Yeonghyeon set down the teacup on the old table with a sound. The liquid, almost like plain water, rippled for a moment before settling quietly.
Envers slightly bowed his head.
“Ah, thank you.”
“It’s lukewarm tea, so if you delay, it will quickly cool.”
“Then I shall drink and quickly begin.”
“......”
The deeper meaning was “If you don’t want to drink cold tea, hurry up and state your business and get out of here,” but Envers interpreted it as “She likes cold tea.”
Only the clever Namgung Myeong, who clearly understood her intentions, was anxiously thinking that they should leave quickly.
Hee Yeonghyeon, thinking that beating around the bush would only prolong the conversation, spoke directly.
“What are your intentions?”
“Intentions... What intentions do you mean?”
“Why do you speak of news about the 13th generation Beggar’s Union Leader who went missing along with the Heavenly Demon 30 years ago... Do you think you can handle us with shallow lies just because we’ve fallen so low?”
“You misunderstand. I have never uttered a lie.”
Bang!
Hee Yeonghyeon slammed down the teapot forcefully. The table shook, creating ripples.
“Then, please explain how you obtained that information.”
“...Well, there is a wizard who handles dimensional powers, and in a mysterious tower, the Heavenly Demon and Master, I mean the Beggar’s Union Leader...”
“Ha, now you don’t even try to hide your lies?”
“......”
It was indeed a hard story to believe.
Even Envers, who had actually experienced it, hesitated while telling it, so how could he explain it to the inhabitants of this other world? As he was confused and perplexed, unexpected support came.
It was Namgung Myeong, sitting straight with his hands clenched into fists on his knees.
“It was the wrist.”
However, in Namgung Seungah’s case, her rising anger was clearly visible. She was naturally impatient with sitting still, and moreover, wasn’t a gaze something quite elusive?
“...Sh-Shoulder?”
“No.”
“...Ch-Chest?”
“No.”
Selvier had also reddened like this before exploding not long after. Envers silently counted to three. One, two, three.
Bang.
“I’m telling you, it doesn’t work! This, are you actually lying just to tease us, Daoist Cheonghwi...?!”
“That’s slander. I, too, learned it this way from Luna... I mean, from someone called Yue2.”
“So, how can one develop such a sense just by feeling gazes–”
“Oh, is it the crown, Daoist?”
Both Namgung Seungah, who was arguing, and Envers, who was making excuses, turned to look at Namgung Myeong simultaneously. Then, Namgung Myeong, who had his eyes gently closed, concentrated for a moment and spoke.
“It’s the face.”
“...Not even three hours have passed!”
When they tested the Gaze Insight further, Namgung Myeong had awakened to the method of sensing gazes with considerable proficiency. His accuracy was high, and moreover, he was quickly becoming accustomed to it.
Now he was pretending to dodge by moving his body here and there, assuming attacks would come from the direction of the gazes. His movements seemed logical and effective.
Seeing this, Namgung Seungah seemed to grow impatient. She squeezed her eyes shut, plopped down in her spot, and raised her voice.
“Damn it... Look at me quickly, Daoist Cheonghwi! I’ll figure it out soon too!”
“Well...”
“I said look at me!”
Envers ignored Namgung Seungah’s nagging voice and gazed at Namgung Myeong with mysterious eyes. This young boy was a genius with exceptional intuition from birth.
Three more hours passed, but Namgung Seungah still couldn’t grasp it. Envers was greatly worried that this might create distance between the siblings, but it was an unfounded concern.
“...How are you so good at martial arts?!”
“N-Noonim. It hurts!”
Namgung Seungah knew how to swallow her jealousy. She vented her various frustrations by messing up her younger brother’s hair. The scene looked quite familiar.
“Is this common?”
“...Yes, Daoist Cheonghwi. Myeong always surges ahead like this. Even the Clan Lord has said, ‘You are truly the greatest talent under heaven.’”
“I think that’s excessive praise. Noonim’s sword movements are beautiful and excellent, and Hyungnim Zhao is far, far beyond me!”
“Think of how much of an age difference there is between you and Young Master Zhao!”
Namgung Myeong laughed awkwardly, thinking it was too much praise. Envers felt a twinge in his heart at the sense of déjà vu. After hesitating for a while, he cautiously asked.
“...Are you close with your brother?”
“Yes! Hyungnim Zhao is very busy, so we can’t spend time together often... but he’s always concerned about me. Last time, he even bought me a talisman!”
“That must have been wonderful.”
“Yes. If I have one dream... it’s to assist Hyungnim Zhao when he becomes the Clan Lord. And I’ll make our clan prosper!”
Sparkle sparkle. His eyes were shining. And beyond the boy’s eyes...
I’ll become Big Brother Roderus’ right hand!
The image of the past flashed by, sticking viscously.
Envers, unable to face it, squeezed his eyes shut.
“...You’ll surely be able to achieve it.”
Even behind closed eyelids, like the dark spots that remain after looking at the sun, the faded memories of youth lingered for a long time.
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“The roast pig is this way, you fool, this way!”
“Hurry, set up the tables, and hang the flags over there!”
The banquet preparations were extremely noisy. All sorts of workers bustled about moving furniture and food, while the Namgung family members, neatly dressed, engaged in conversation with each other.
In the distance, Namgung Myeong and Namgung Zhao could be seen greeting each other with smiles. On the surface, they looked like truly close brothers.
Watching that scene with sunken eyes.
Envers was quiet amidst the commotion.
“......”
Sometimes, he felt as if he had lost his way. What meaning was there in cultivating martial arts so diligently? The vague dream of returning to that mansion and gaining everyone’s recognition— wasn’t it already too late?
[Dream : Return to the Redburn mansion, prove my skills, make those who looked down on me kneel, and become the Household Head’s right hand...?]
Could he even achieve it?
With this body that starts to ache when using mana, could he even achieve it?
But now, even if the Dog Beating Staff Technique returns, what meaning would it have?
The words of Yeonghyeon, the current Beggar’s Union Leader, seemed to echo in his ears. That question was filled with bitter skepticism. Would the future get better, could they pick up what had fallen— these were fundamental doubts.
“...I.”
In the midst of such confusion, very faintly. As if sunlight and moonlight were brushing past.
The incident occurred.
Tap tap tap tap.
The sound of footsteps was heard, and the Namgung Clan’s martial artists surrounded Envers in a circle. As he raised his head, the Daoist from the reception hall stepped forward, fanning himself.
“What is this about?”
“Hmph, your act ends here. With my Immortal Powers, I’ve been watching closely what you’ve been doing outside!”
“...?”
By outside, did he mean the visit to the Hao Sect with the Namgung siblings?
“I hear you tempted the failing Beggar’s Union with the lost Dog Beating Staff Technique? Then, where exactly did you get that technique? It disappeared along with the Heavenly Demon!”
“No, that’s...!”
“There’s only one answer. You bastard, you are a pawn of the Demonic Cult-!!”
“...?!”
A sinister claw, a demonic hand, reached out.
1. Seodang were private village schools providing elementary education during the Goryeo and Joseon dynasties of Korea.2. Yue means Moon in Chinese.